No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.
The Spanish Inquisition has three main weapons; threesomes, branding, tattoos, and exhibitionism.
Four main weapons; threesomes, branding, tattoos, exhibitionism, and nipple piercings.
Five main weapons…
And so it goes here. There are three things in this relationship that I have taken “off the table.” Well, four if you listen to me tell it – to Amy it’s only three; and that’s something we joke about.
Before we met, when we were talking on the phone or by IM, we were both very open about what we liked and didn’t like in our lifestyles. I’ve lived a more sexually adventurous life in some ways than Amy until now. I say that with some hesitation, as it isn’t entirely true, but it will work as a shorthand for now as people still learn about us. It would be the common perception of us, by an outsider.
The three (four) things are all things that I liked, that concerned Amy, and after discussion I pulled them from our inevitable, yet still upcoming at the time, relationship.
The first is threesomes. Amy is monogamous, and has concerns about bringing a third person into our relationship in any sexual or emotional way. Next is body modification, and the final one is exhibitionism, which we consider to be any D/s play in public that exposes Amy physically or emotionally beyond traditional limits of accepted cultural behavior.
I like MM/F threesomes, because of the objectification they force, at least the way I do them, on the woman in the threesome. To me, the feeling is one of complete ownership and domination of an owned slave, used for pleasure, and shared by her owner with no regard to her wishes, nor is she able to have any control over her own body, even to the point of who she has sex with. Amy sees this as hot, but had fears it could damage her emotionally.
Amy did not want her body marked by branding and tattooing; her main concern seems to be about the message those marks would send about her, to the people who would be in a position to see them, such as her children.
And exhibitionism. Amy is not the least bit sexually exhibitionistic in a public setting, and prefers to keep her sex life out of the public eye, although she is experimenting with me here in this blog about revealing herself, but only anonymously of course.
After discussion, I told Amy I would remove these options from our relationship. My feeling is that Amy, who has a deep, deep desire to please, would be willing to do things she felt were harmful to herself, if she thought I wanted her to do them. So it’s not a matter of letting her decide if she wants to do them; she will want to do them if they please me. I have to make that decision for her, as I do so many other decisions that are important between us.
Amy will no doubt have her own take on these topics, and will probably speak to these issues at some point as well.
To me, these are ways that we can use to further our D/s relationship, but they are not the only tools, and there are others far more effective and exciting than the ones I have decided not to use for now. The last three nights, for example, I have made Amy sleep at the bottom of the bed with my cock in her mouth, a wonderful way to take away her former expectations of even where she will sleep at night. For the moment, I have not yet made her sleep on a large pillow with the dogs, nor have I forbidden her the use of furniture, but all in good time.